I feel my cross burning into my chest,
charring my soft delicate flesh
Such impurities in my head…
I can’t shake these thoughts in my mind
They’re controlling my every move
my every action
I can feel the blood on my lips
The drips fall onto my breasts
A single swipe of my hand
and I smear the blood across my chest
I bend down and pull my knife from my boot
I burn the blade with my lighter
Until it’s too hot to touch
Then I slice into my thigh
The pain is numbing
But tears still roll down my cheek
The knife slips from my fingers and falls to the ground
I sit on the cold ground
as I watch the blood stream down my leg
I watch in amusement, as it doesn’t stop…
I begin to laugh at myself wickedly
relishing in my own pain.